Velvet Armor?

Oops …There goes my heart 🙁

I’ve gone from writing my heart out in private notes to now having those thoughts out in the open for everyone to see. It feels super cringey, especially because I’ve been feeling so closed off emotionally. And you know what they say about time and life experiences. As we grow up, it’s easy to become hardened by life’s hardships and get locked up in our emotions and thoughts, believing no one needs to know what’s going on or how we feel. It’s easy to hide behind perfection, silence, or even a carefully curated image…and choosing to share intentionally, I believe, makes you(me) braver. Sometimes, we have to see life more lightly than it chooses to present itself (sort of like rebellion against silence or events that should typically weigh me down).

I’ve spent some time questioning whether this is the best way to live, and I don’t think it is. I’m now beginning to understand the difference and importance of sorting through my thoughts inwardly, and also finding the words to express how those thoughts make me feel, as well as discerning what’s necessary to share and what’s okay to keep to myself.

For certain, I do not want to be vulnerable with everyone, because I genuinely believe that not all my thoughts are meant for everyone. Only those who are truly a solid place for me deserve to see me in this light. I’ve been fighting the battle of showing up in the world as authentically as I can be, while keeping my private life private, but haven’t exactly been able to find a middle ground for both to coexist.

I don’t exactly know how this journey of writing or blogging while being reflective will turn out, but one thing’s for sure: writing is an outlet for me, and I shouldn’t stop, because it truly keeps me alive.

Here’s to living, writing and staying true to who I truly am.